So... I was thinking. I live in Chicago, right? And Chicago is a really pretty city, isnt it? And there are tons of fun things to do in Chicago. So... when I move back down town, why dont I get my lazy ass out of my cute little dorm room and get out into the city to take pictures. I did it once for a class, and never again. I went to the Shedd once with Brian and took some good pictures, but couldnt find them either.

Here is my plan. I am now a psych major, and for one of my classes we have to write a two page paper every week to talk about something we saw, why we think it happened, what the person was thinking and all psych stuff like that. For this year, I wanted to go downtown every week to just sit around and observe people. And I have been dying to get back onto devart. So, why dont I take pictures of things on my way out, spend good time with friends, have a good walk, work on my paper, and just have a damn good time? Five hours a week, me and a bunch of friends can go out places and have a blast, and I can take pictures so you guys still think I'm alive

Btw... if I cant spell or talk right, its because its 2:30 in the morning

Lots of new cool things, like prom. But I dont have the time or the energy to talk about that now, so I'll leave this for a later entry.

wow... my mom and i totally redid the entire apartment. (btw, why is it called an apartment when its all together? just a random thought) my mom and i changed rooms, well, my stuff is in the living room and hers is in the bedroom, but its still very diffrent. even my computer is in the living room. we also moved all of her books into her new room, and got me a new bookcase thats very pretty. we bought a new tv (more on that later) and a cute little color printer. oh, and a cd rack. and one of those cabinets that go under your desk thats really cute. and a bunch of desk organizers. i should take a picture of it all when everything is done. none of you would really care, because no one has seen my little apartment. but really... its a LOT diffrent.

and more on the tv... its about damn time we got a new one. our old one had no color or contrast (well, it did, but barely) and whenever it was a dark thing, it was almost black. now its just so amazing and clear and sharp and just perfect. its a cute tv too, but my mom wants to return it to buy a new one. im just trying to get her not to, because i do like my tv so much.

oh, we also bought one of those memory foam matress covers. its a king size, but we doubbled it up and put it on my the couch. i dont know if i spelled that right. its almost 1:30, forgive me. but that thing is wonderful because i have issues with my back, and its just so nice and soft to lay on. but not too soft, just perfect because it forms to your body. and the best part is when you move, it reforms in seconds, and its so cushy when you first sit on it.

overall, i love the changes that are going on. oh, and im weight watchers, so im loosing weight too. there isnt a thing that im not happy about now. oh how i could make a list of all of the perfect things that are happening. the only unperfect thing is all of the moving and shit like that we have to do in order to get this place looking cute. but really, thats nothing. yeah, it may kill my back after a while, but its so worth it! im feeling so spoiled about everything

i dont know how i feel. i mean, i dont feel good, but i dont feel bad. im just kinda like "bla." my most extreme emotion was yesterday when i got mad at john, but that wasnt even too bad. i think im loosing my ability to feel anything, if that can even happen. just everything is kinda a blur, and i dont really care about anything. i dont know if thats a good thing or not, but i dont really have an opinion.
Im on a new diet. its the negative calorie diet. i like it a lot because it has lots of fruits and veggies in it. it always makes you hungry though, because its nothing too substancial. i dont know if thats spelled right, but fuck it.
i may be a part of java live if i can get to a color printer on time to do it. i get to put my pics up on a poster and leave it out, which is really cool. if anyone actually reads this, and if they actually like a picture of mine, tell me, and ill make a note to print it out. no pictures of me. at all. i dont want that. not sure why, but i just dont.
im writing in really short sentances, which is weird because i am usually very wordy. im the kind of person who gets the little "long sentance" alert on word when im doing a paper.
i also need inspiration to do something. i havent updated this thing in a very very long time. maybe because artists feel eveything through what they do, and since i cant really feel much, nothing inspires me.
maybe this will form a new style or something cool like that. who knows, maybe ill start doing pictures of my wall, and random things in my room.

enough of my rambling, im going to sleep.

I hate the world, and mainly human nature. In my history class, we have been learning about industrialism, and all of the things that allowed the cruel behaviour to workers and shit like that. All of these things have one thing in common: doing it to gain money. Who cares about money anyway? Its not like it has any value? Yeah, you can buy stuff with it and shit like that, but what value does it ACTUALLY hold? Who says that the bills you are carying actually mean something besides a peice of paper with some pretty pictures on it? The only thing keeping the dollar worth anything is the fact that the oil people only take u.s. money for their oil. at least before, we had the gold standard, but now its just some stupid shit that is depleting every day. if they ever decide to take the euro instead, we are all fucked because it wont have any meaning. and even if it DID mean anything, its not like anyone leads such an important life where it would count for a single thing. some people are so obsessed with gaining as much money as possible, that they forget to be happy.

I guess what i really want to know is what is it about money that people want so much?